I want to start by thanking you all for being here today to celebrate my Mom, Barbara Osman Stenton-  Such a beautiful, kind, sweet woman in our lives.

To give you a better idea of who this special woman was, I thought I would mention a few specific memories I have of her from my childhood-  Memories that truly encapsulate her beloved soul.

The first memory I would like to share dates back to a time when I was a young kid (around the age of 5 or 6).  Unfortunately, I had a proclivity back then for sometimes having an upset stomach. I had just thrown up in bed during the late night hours and my sister, Sandra, went to get Mom right away for help. Now most moms would probably be really frustrated to have to be woken in the middle of the night clean up the mess from their sick child, but not Mom. I could tell she was sleepy as all get out that night, as she gradually managed to get me cleaned up and give me a bath. She then proceeded to clean all of my sheets and blankets in the washing machine and get clean bedding ready for me on the couch. Of course she did all of the right things you would expect a good Mom to do in this type of situation, but what I remember the most about that night was how she did these things with love. She never once looked frustrated or upset with what happened. She never once complained even though I could tell she was extremely tired. When I said how sorry I was that I got sick, she soothed me by telling me not to worry about it and that everything was going to be all right. That is the type of Mom she was- extremely selfless and always there to help others even if she herself was exhausted and not always feeling well. She was always willing to make sacrifices for her family.

The second memory I would like to share goes back to when I was in the third grade. Mom taught me an important life lesson then that I would never forget. At that time, I had developed a rather large group of friends and let’s say that my priorities weren't exactly where they should be. I started to focus more on hanging out with friends and being cool. My academics played second fiddle that year as I navigated a new exciting world of popularity. Mom definitely took notice and saw a difference in me during this period- She did not always like what she saw. The breaking point came when a teacher from my 3rd grade class, Mrs. Hodgedon called her up and explained how I was not completing all of my homework assignments and my grades were starting to slip. So Mom and I then had a strong heart to heart Mom to Daughter conversation, which resulted in me changing course.

Mom always emphasized the importance of doing the right things for God and she could tell I was starting to stray from that path. Leave it to Mom . . .I didn’t always want to hear what she had to say, but I had to admit, she was always right. One of the things I loved the most about her was that she was never afraid to call it as she saw it.  She knew that being a great Mom was not about being best friends with your daughters, but rather about preparing them for a successful life filled with virtue and integrity. As time went by- with Mom’s help and wise guidance, popularity and being cool became less important to me, and being genuine, kind, diligent with my studies, and having the right kind of friends by my side became my top priorities. As always Mom was my guiding compass.

Finally, my third memory dates back to when I was in the 5th grade. I was generally a good kid who usually followed what my parents asked of me, but there is one Christmas season in particular where my mischievous side got the better of me. I had always joked around with my family for years saying that one day I would uncover the secret hidden location where Mom and Dad hid all of their Christmas gifts. So one December when I was in our basement looking for some supplies for a school project, I happened to notice that a certain storage closet door that usually remained tightly locked, was now left open as the lock dangled loosely from it’s latch. “Bingo!” I thought. I always wondered if this was Mom and Dad’s secret Santa’s workshop containing the hidden stash of gifts and my curiosity took over.  At first, I planned on just spying a couple of small items to see if I was correct (After all, no one would ever know, I am not hurting anyone, what harm could there be?) . . . . but then curiosity eventually led to complete intrigue as I started delving further into the closet, ravaging more and more boxes. “Wow!”- I said as I looked at all of the items with Sandra’s name or my name printed neatly on each package. It was like a child’s personal Toys R’ Us within the secret confines of a closet. But as with all devious acts, this little kid’s secret venture into Christmas mayhem had come to an end . . .  I was caught red handed.  What was even worse is my Mom always knew when I was lying. No matter what lame excuses I tried to drum up, she always seemed to sniff out the truth. “Always be straight with people about all of the facts Jennie. Honesty is the best policy”, she always used to say. In a feeble last attempt to lower my impending punishment, I found myself blurting out to her, “But what harm did I do? It’s not even a big deal and no one got hurt. It doesn’t really matter that I saw all of the gifts ahead of time”. But Mom always had a wise answer for everything. She patiently explained to me that not only did I disobey Mom and Dad by continuing to look into boxes that I knew were forbidden, but that I took away the element of surprise. She continued further, mentioning how when we make a conscious decision, we need to think carefully about how our words and actions also affect other people around us. Mom had a way of explaining things so that we could understand the full repercussions of our actions and her lessons made powerful impacts on us- I like to think of them as permanent imprints upon our souls.

As you can imagine, that Christmas was different from all of the others that year. Sure, I liked all of my gifts and they were what any kid would want, but just as Mom had predicted, things just didn’t feel the same that holiday. The element of surprise was now vanquished, the joy not quite as bright, the smiles on my parents’ faces were still visible, but a hint of disappointment could still be detected.  As I tore through the wrapping paper on each present, it was like another reminder needling me with guilt about what I had done and how some of the joy had been taken away from this beautiful family moment.  Later that night, before going to bed I approached Mom. “I am so sorry that I ruined Christmas this year”, I told her with tears welling up in my eyes. “You didn’t ruin anything”, she said with her arms wrapped around me, “but you did learn a very important lesson and I can tell that this won’t ever happen again. Christmas is about celebrating Jesus’ birth, not about the gifts that we receive. The lesson that you learned from this is far more valuable than all of the presents in the world.” Of course, Mom was right as usual and it was an important memory that has remained clearly etched in my mind all of these years. Mom spoke genuinely from her heart and there was always truth in her words; qualities that I hope to always demonstrate with our son, Anthony.

There is a quote from the movie “The Crow” that states: “If the people we love are stolen from us, the way to have them live on is to never stop loving them. Buildings burn, people die, but real love is forever”. Sandra, Dad, and I have been talking a lot about how we can keep Mom’s memory alive and continue to love her. The best tribute that we can provide for Mom is choosing to live our lives with the same lessons that she has taught us. Whether it is patiently cleaning up after a sick child, instilling the fundamental importance of being honorable and virtuous, being considerate of others’ feelings, or standing up for what you believe despite what others think . . . . we can choose to live out these same principles within our own daily lives. Mom chose to focus on inner beauty her whole life and that is what makes her stand out from all of the rest.  For this we are better people for having known her. We are truly blessed that she has touched all of our lives with her infinite wisdom and grace.

Love,
   Jennie

"Mom, I can't do this. What if I forget what to say . . . . and then everyone laughs", I cried to my mom as l anxiously looked down at my flashcards.  Our classroom teacher had made her expectations for our upcoming projects well known earlier that day and it was emphasized that we would not be allowed to look down at our notes for too long.  I was preparing for my very first class presentation in 4th grade and the idea of getting up in front of my peers with all eyes on me was absolutely terrifying. 

"It's okay Jennie. You'll do great. It's all about practicing and breaking the project down into smaller parts. I'll help you practice the first part of your speech today and then we can work on another section together tomorrow". Mom always had this sweet, gentle way of making me feel that I could conquer any problem and that things were never as bad as they seemed. 

During the next two weeks, I practiced standing in front of a fake podium that consisted of piled up pillows and recited my speech about Helen Keller, my favorite historical hero.  Even though Mom was very busy with various household chores, she always gave me her undivided attention whenever I needed anything.  Nothing was more important to her than spending time with her family.  She always had these great suggestions too, which included adding a little sign-language during my presentation. Each day when I practiced in front of her, she would give me supportive, uplifting comments.  "You're doing great.  Just practice that last portion a little more and I think you're all set. I told you that you could do this."  

When the day finally arrived to recite my speech in front of my class, it didn't seem so scary anymore.  I had practiced it so much that I knew the entire speech by heart.  I also remember what my Mom kept telling me. "You've got this Jennie. Just take it one step at a time". At the end of the day, I ran into my Mom's arms and thanked her for all of her help. I told her how I was able to recite the entire speech with my head held high in front of the class.  It was such a wonderful feeling of accomplishment at that moment, but most importantly it truly was a reflection of the types of life lessons that my Mom instilled within my sister Sandra and I from an early age.  She taught us that even though things can seem very daunting at first, to just keep trying your best and tackle each problem one step at a time. Furthermore, she would always emphasize how God is watching over us and would help us get through every hurdle life set before us.  

I never imagined that we would need to hold onto Mom's words of wisdom more than ever to help us get through the biggest obstacle of our lives-  healing from her tragic death.  My Dad, sister, and I are really struggling during this difficult time and are asking for God to give us strength. If only all of life's problems could be limited to a class presentation or a tough day at work.  If only we didn't have to lose the loved ones in our lives who we cherish so much. I can still imagine my Mom's sweet voice and what she would be telling us to do right now to get through this unbearable pain.  She would gently place her hand on our shoulders while smiling and say, "You've got this. God will help you through this period. Just take it one day at a time." 

Love,  Jennie

One really cool memory I have of my Mom was during a time in which my sister (Sandra) was sleeping over a friend's house for a long weekend and I had to sleep in our bedroom alone without my sister for the first time.  I was really afraid of the dark, especially since Sandra wasn't there with with me.  So mom stayed in Sandra's bed during the first night until I eventually fell fast asleep. It was always very comforting knowing when she was there with me. 

During the second night it was a lot tougher for me to fall off though and I kept tossing and turning.  Well, I have such a cool Mom that she let me go into the living room with her and gave me a cup of milk.  She turned on the movie, "Mr. Mom" and I thought Micheal Keaton was absolutely hilarious!  I kept giggling throughout the movie, especially at the scenes of the uncontrollable vacuum cleaner and the marathon competition where Mr. Mom intentionally throws the race to help his wife. I do remember Mom changing the channel at some of the bad parts since I was still rather young, but I thought it was so neat to actually be staying up late with my Mom, just like an adult. She winked and told me, "It will be our little secret Jennie. It's something special between us". 

That is what I loved about my Mom the most.  She was so good at following the rules and doing the right thing, but at the same time she knew just the right times to bend the rules a little when she knew it would help someone, especially a little kid like me.  Till this day whenever "Mr. Mom" comes on television, I always think back to that special memory of my mom letting me stay up late and feeling all grown up, just me and her- a couple of night owls!  By the way, when I finally drifted off to sleep that night, I never slept so soundly!   Love, Jennie E.