Femi, I woke up this morning thinking I had had the most horrific nightmare, but I think it's real! You are no longer with us in body! Living can never be the same again my treasured brother.
I miss you every second of each day.
I love you forever my own Obafemi .

Femi, dearest Femi,
my first ever christmas without you.... it felt so empty. I miss you too much. My rock! Nobody can replace you in my life. Its just not the same world anymore.
Continue to rest in peace in God's bosom.
I love you always.

Femi, I still cannot fathom it all. It was never meant to be this way. Everyday brings a memory and immense pain for me.....From Obanikoro/Feso to the memorable one year we spent at Igbobi college before we both left for uncharted waters much to our shock when our parents decided that was best .

Your pranks in chapel at school...being very funny and witty under your breath in case the headmaster caught us......waiting for me at break time as we were in different class rooms, coke, gala at the back gate, taking the piss out of our seniors who we thought were naff!!!!!!!!.

Later In London......so much so much that we shared. An through it all you remained a perfect gentleman, but never ever dull or boring or naff.

I have been pondering and asking God why??????? Why???

As I told sister Lola, your death reaffirmed a challenge which i set myself before but which now I must certainly complete...to live a life worth living, but more importantly to live for salvation.

I have no doubt my brother that you are with the angels, cradled by your lovely mum, and your charming, kind and generous father.

Femi my brother you showed me boundless love and kindness even when we were too young to understand what that meant.

I just don't get it. I know posting this message won't make it better for me, but it feels good to be able to express myself.

Thank you for the times but i cannot stop crying...............love you bro

My cousin that I ever met once about four years ago but left an unforgettable dent in my mind. He asked for members of families by their names and his keen interest of their welfare. I wish I know him more. The turn up of friends and family at the songs of praise in Lagos speaks volume.
Omo Noforija lagbara ko, omo eye foju ORUN sore re, sun re oo.
Popoola Jaiyesimi.

Unbelievable! I cannot imagine what you are going through.......Femi, the quintessential sharp gentleman and indeed the best big brother there ever was to my treasured sister Bola, he made me truly jealous I didn't have a big brother!! Rest perfectly in the bosom of the Lord. And my sister Bola, words fail me. ........may the Holy Spirit the Comforter, comfort you, Busola, Lola and the entire family like no one and no words can. And yes, my dear, it IS well. Love you always.

"Femi, its been forty days and I haven't heard from you. The longest forty days ever and the longest we have ever never been in communication. I miss you so much...

You made such a fuss about not wanting me to be alone on my birthday so you booked a flight to come out here. I kept insisting it was okay and I didn't mind being alone. Well, its actually not fine. It feels so empty that you are not here after all. Dena cancelled your flight. It must have been so difficult for her to make that call.

I keep looking at my phone to see if the flashing light would be a text from you... You really must be gone or you would have sent a message.

I miss you my dearest brother. I miss your laughter; I miss our jokes that only us would find funny; I miss your wise counsel; I miss your attention; I miss my best friend.

I love you Femi. Sun re my beloved brother. Rest well in God's bosom."

LETTING Him Go

There is a particular kind of suffering to be experienced when you love something or someone greater than yourself. ...A tender sacrifice.

Like the pained silence felt in the song of a mermaid, or the bent and broken feet of a dancing ballerina.....reading Femi's life achievements in his chosen career underscores the many great things i only got to hear about this great mind.

Honestly i was looking forward to meeting this great mind some time soon.....but i know now God has other plans !

My heart felt sympathy goes to his sibblings most especially Bola cos I know for a fact they were like siamese twins. However i implore them to be mindful and take solace in the fact about what the word says about eternity which is the great or ultimate transition for all living souls...i quote :

You have been raised to life with Christ, so set your hearts on the things that are in heaven, where Christ sits on his throne @ the right side of God.
Keep your minds fixed on things there, not on things here on earth.

For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.

Your real life is Christ and when he appears ,then you will appear with him and share his glory ! (Col 3 1-4)

Adieu the friend i never had the chance to meet personally ....May the Good Lord continue to rest your soul.

Still cant believe you are gone, Femi

Tried to reach out to you yesterday just to chat - and I just felt this absence --I really need your guidance and support as I try to carry out the final preparations for our 3rd Annual CEO Forum. You were such a pillar of support. We are all feeling your absence Femi. You left us too soon. Continue to rest in peace dear friend.

My heart goes out to Bola and the family on your great loss....May God bring you peace and comfort at this time of sadness and grief.

To Lola, Busola & Bolajoko,
Words written, words spoken can never ease the pain that you girls are going through right now. Words can never fill the void left by Femi's sudden demise. We all have asked the question Why so soon as Lord you promised us three score and ten and Your Word never returns to You void. We are then reminded that He is the Alpha & the Omega, the Beginning and Finisher of our faith. He is also the Great Comforter in our time of sorrow. I am reminded of a song by CeCe Winans- Comforter
Faithful friend and father
I've called you through the years.
You've been the great physician when sickness lingered near.
Through distressing moments your name is new and sweet
You've become a comforter to me

To the grieving family who weeps for loved ones gone
The pain of separation consumes another home.
On the waves of sorrow
You walk with perfect ease
Comforter is who the whole world needs.

And it is who I turn you all over to. He is the Balm in Gilead to heal your soul, to soothe your hurt, to once a again give you all a reason to live. We will never understand this for His ways are not our ways and His thoughts are not our thoughts. But in our pain, and through our tears we still have to say thank you Lord for the life Femi lived. We say thank you for those 49 wonderful years though short. I now asked for His help to help you all get through this. For weeping may endure for a night but joy comes in the morning.
May the Good Lord comfort and soothe your hearts.

It really still beats my imaginations so hard. I can't even get off the thoughts of you daily. Like a ritual, I feel this pain could be soothed somehow just by opening this page daily. Dr. Femi........ words can't illustrate how deeply broken I feel. "Not so soon, why you, wasn't there any quick rescue, couldn't you have hung on a little while ......." Endless thoughts..... I believe the best is known by our Almighty God.

Hmmmmmm..... I pray for soothing comfort for dear Aunty Bola, Busola and Lola. Heart aching, unthinkable but Lord, please grant peace to your daughters in Jesus name.

Words fail me still.......
Perfect gentleman and brother, you were a star. May you rest in peace and may the God of all comfort uphold Lola, Busola and Bolajoko.

4 weeks on,and no OB! It is not real,it can't be real! I always used to ask my daddy 'why' and God says He is 'Abba father'! WHY.WHY.WHY? I ask!!!

My darling,most cherished one and only brother! How can this be?! I wake up each morning to the possibility that I had a horrendous dream!
Obafemi temi nin kan tan WHY, WHY, Lord WHY.
LIfe has no meaning for me anymore. Our precious 'abolly Bolly' needs all our prayers. See you again soon my treasured one and only ever brother,friend,comfort and adviser.
You,daddy and mummy look after our 'abolly,Bolly ' .
I love you and miss you greatly.

A truly brilliant mind and fine gentleman.
Stay blessed.

"The songs of the waves and the hymns of the streams
Are scattered, and the voices of the throngs reduced to silence;
And I can hear naught but the music of Eternity
In exact harmony with the spirit's desires.
I am cloaked in full whiteness;
I am in comfort; I am in peace."

Femi, I had not seen you in such a long time! When I heard of your passing, I was so sad. Why? You are so young....I remember you well. So handsome! Dark and handsome. And I remember your lovely, warm smile. And I remember people telling me of your academic exploits and yet, Femi, you were so modest. A perfect gentlemen. A a bright light from my secondary school days in the UK! A jewel. You continue to be one. A pride to Nigeria, Africa and America. You led a distinguished life, Femi. The world has lost you but we have all gained so much beauty in our hearts by having known you. At whatever stage of our lives. May your lovely soul rest in perfect peace. Amen. My love to you and blessings, Femi. From Toun Williams

Dearest Obi, Your passing has left an immense void here at Southdale. We miss you more than words can say. I am so thankful for having had the opportunity to know you, even for the short time that I did. You will always be my mentor and continue to inspire and motivate me even still. I pray that you are at peace and that I will see you again on the other end of this life.

Dearest Femi ! A gentleman to the core, we didn't see you often but somehow you or your words were always part of our conversation. Whatever Femi said, was the correct, most well thought out and the proper way to do it. You will be sorely missed. The brightest lights always dim so quickly but we will remember you always. May God continue to comfort Bola, Lola and Busola and your nieces and nephews who all miss you. You were a rock to them, but God will surely give them a foundation to stand on, to bear your loss. Thank you for being a friend, it was a privilege and a joy… Rest in Perfect Peace...

My darling, how can I be writing this! I still phone Bola all the time to wake me up from this NIGHTMARE
Uncle and only God father to My three.

You are a Doctor who lived in America,but got a highly reputable law firm in England for Peaches! What a man! What an uncle,what a brother and what a friend.
We had been texting back and forth a couple of days before and I told you this text business is too much for me, you are a 'a pro', actually in everything you do.( can't use the past tense re you). Our darling Bola and the Conolly family gave you a most beautiful send off, I know you are proud of all.

I sat by the lake where you are interred,and the peace,lovely greenery,and calm lake are incredible.

Aburo mi Owon ,now egbon mi atata , may the light of Christ lead you home. Amen.
Look forward to meeting up again,my own Obafemi, REST,rest in the Peace of our Lord Jesus Christ.
To whom shall I run to for selfless true advice and right admonition from time to time?? ' Busola you are not compliant with your Meds' you always said.

Pele oh oko mi, adeori me, sun re oh,till we meet again

ILOVE AND MISS YOU ALREADY.

Bu.'

My darling, how can I be writing this! I still phone Bola all the time to wake me up from this NIGHTMARE
Uncle and only God father to My three.

You are a Doctor who lived in America,but got a highly reputable law firm in England for Peaches! What a man! What an uncle,what a brother and what a friend.
We had been texting back and forth a couple of days before and I told you this text business is too much for me, you are a 'a pro', actually in everything you do.( can't use the past tense re you). Our darling Bola and the Conolly family gave you a most beautiful send off, I know you are proud of all.

I sat by the lake where you are interred,and the peace,lovely greenery,and calm lake are incredible.

Aburo mi Owon ,now egbon mi atata , may the light of Christ lead you home. Amen.
Look forward to meeting up again,my own Obafemi, REST,rest in the Peace of our Lord Jesus Christ.
To whom shall I run to for selfless true advice and right admonition from time to time?? ' Busola you are not compliant with your Meds' you always said.

Pele oh oko mi, adeori me, sun re oh,till we meet again

ILOVE AND MISS YOU ALREADY.

Bu.'

I cannot believe that dear Femi is gone so soon to a better place. Femi was my true friend, sincere loyal and honest with a wry sense of humour, he would say one comment and I would laugh for weeks. One of the most fiercely intelligent men, yet kind, gentle, giving everyone the utmost respect. Femi, I will miss you, and I will miss our friendship, Rest in Peace, May Almighty God comfort Bola, Lola and Busola. Amen.

TRIBUTE TO DR. OBAFEMI AYANTUGA

Dr. Obafemi Ayantuga's demise came as a shock.

Femi and I parted ways 34 years ago when as bubbly teenagers, we had completed our secondary education at King's College, Lagos.

As fate would have it, we have not set eyes on each other since that time. We were destined, however, to establish communications during the yuletide of 2014 and had remained in contact until his demise on the 23rd July, 2015. His passing is indeed very sudden as I observe his having read a post I had sent to our KCOB class of '81 forum about noon (Nigerian Time) on that fateful day!

Although Femi and I were not in the same arm of class, we belonged to the same House - the enviable McKee-Wright's!

It is with a heavy heart that I recall teasing him, during a chat in December 2014, about being an "ajebutter" who cheerily strolled into school each morning as a day student and also recollected the white Mercedes Benz (LAB 1) that conveyed him to and from school. Femi had excitedly remarked, "impressive recall, Ibrahim!" I wondered what he would have said, had I told him all that I remembered about the Senator's car that brought him to and from school. Unknown to Femi, his friends took delight in looking out for his father's car as it would always be full of the lovely Ayantuga girls, the driver having picked them up from school before coming for Femi.

To God be the glory, for it is a remarkable act of providence that after three odd decades of parting and only a few months from his departing this life, Femi would re-establish contact with many of his classmates, reminiscing about our times at King's College in memory of affections old and true!

As we mourn the loss of one of our own, may family members be comforted by the outpouring of love surrounding you all.

Yours sorrowfully,

For: KCOB Class of '81

Ibrahim L. Ciroma
Kaduna, Nigeria

On behalf my entire family, we wish to send our deepest sympathy to Busola and Lola and the entire Ayantuga family for this great loss. Losing a sibling is extremely difficult. May God comfort and give you the strength you need at this time. May his soul rest in perfect peace. He has left a great legacy and will therefore be always remembered. Ozege and Ebele

Love and Light

OMGoodness! I didn't think I'd be writing a tribute to you.....I remember thinking about you a few months ago, seeing Lola's pics and remembering our NHCarnival reunion; planning how to get in touch with your sisters & eventually linking up with you- my "school son" of many years ago! Words fail me right now, but I'm proud of you and the fine man you grew up to be...you'll forever have that special place in my heart...May God continue to comfort and strengthen the loved ones you left behind. Sleep on in the bosom of your Saviour till we ALL meet at His feet. Love you 'Femi & RIP. Nwene x

Femi rest in peace.

I loved your laugh Femi. I'll never forget it.

Your life, the love of your family and friends is a wonderful and fitting tribute to a good soul.

Floreat and rest in peace

Adieu Femi.
Fond memories from Sunnyfields. May the Lord comfort Bolajoko, other family members, friends and colleagues that are grieving at this time...

My Condolences and sympathy to your family and loved ones. May your soul rest peacefully.

Femi, you did us proud with your life. You were a star of the family. You did not die in vain. You did us proud with your life.You touched the life of those you came across you. Your life was well appreciated. We are going to miss. Please rest in perfect peace!

Dearest Femi rest in perfect peace. Lost for words!

Dear Femi, Surely I shouldn't be doing this? It feels so wrong. I will miss you, but by all accounts no more than your friends and family that you've left behind in Minneapolis. From our days together at Addenbrookes hospital as struggling SHOs I knew you were destined for great things. You've certainly lived up to that career wise. But what I am truly in awe of, is the place you have in peoples hearts. So I sign up to the charge of keeping you alive in my heart. I will remember you Femi. And I will look after your Bolajoko, to the best of my ability. Rest secure dear friend.

Femi, I've been left speechless for the last few days. So many things running through my mind, so many memories, our short, brief conversations in-between our busy schedules. Thank You for being so supportive of me as a friend, husband and brother. It was such an honor to have you at JeNika and I's wedding. Lots of love from the deepest place in my heart. Goodnight my brother.

I am still so so shocked at the news of Femi's demise. Busola and I talked about him when we met the last time she was in Nigeria.

Great guy!!! My memories of Femi, are of the big brother in the house! Older than even Lola. The MAN! In the house!
The calm!!
The peace!!!
Busola and I talked about how special he is to Victoria and her siblings. To all the families as a whole. I truly was looking forward to at least talking to him one day when I am with Busola.
And now? He is gone. Has been snatched by death.
May his gentle, sweet and precious sole rest in perfect peace with the Lord and may the sweet sweet memories of him keep everyone strong.

Am speechless,everyone has said it all,you were always the perfect gentleman, from the day I met you as Bolajoko Ayantugas brother,my best friend's brother in Femi Ayantuga Close,Bolajoko you know I dint go to England but went to QC because of you, that's when I met your lovely brother who always cheered me on,always had a kind word to say and forever smiling, always ready to help.
You were loved by many and will surely be missed by many.May your gentle soul rest in peace.

He was a true gentleman and always a pleasure to work with. Such a tremendous loss.

So many "if onlys".... Dearest Femi....beloved brother uncle friend.... You will never be forgotten. It is still surreal and strange. Prayers for all your loved ones, that God will give them the strength to carry on.

My dear brother,

You were and remain an angel sent to touch all of our lives in some way.

I, for one, was better off knowing you on a daily basis as 11 - 16 year olds to occasional moments as we passed through lifestages to recently being more often in touch. Having last spoken only three days before, I wish we had more time to enjoy our rekindled brotherhood. Our KC class forum's mobile messaging discussions will not be the same without you. One less unique voice and one very much missed. Our big "50" Reunion next year 2016 will not be the same without you. One less unique presence and one very much irreplaceable. Alas!

Words are not always sufficient. I have dug out a photo of how I best remember you, taken in Earls Court on Saturday 3rd April 1982: serene, alert, amused, focused and fashionable. I will upload it here, if possible, as the site's features suggest.

May God rest your gentle and noble soul as well as bring comfort to your family, particularly Lola, Busola and Bola.

With great sadness and in tribute, I reluctantly bid you "Adieu!" and "Floreat!"

You shall never be forgotten.

Rest in peace.

Femi, you achieved a lot in your life time. A focused and well coordinated person. Well loved. God knows best. It is well.

Femi, thank you for showing us how to leave a legacy that will outlive our earthly presence. Such was your life. You will be sorely missed but we are grateful and all the better for having known you...

It was an honor to know Dr. Ayantuga while I previously worked at FSH. What a brilliant, professional, kind and gentle man. He will be missed by many. My deepest sympathy.

Wow... so sad. I recall our growing up years and seeing you again at your Mum's (Aunty Joke) burial.. Who knew that was going to be the last time... U were always cool, calm and collected often displayed impeccable grace, charm and good manners what I considered qualities of a true and decent gentleman. My thuts and prayers are with sis Lola, Busola and Bola at this very difficult time. Rest in peace Femi.

I never met Femi Ayantuga but I am really impressed by how quickly he achieved so much in so short period of his life. It is must be a thing of pride for his family to celebrate him even in death, such people are never mourned ... eternal rest grant him o lord

Lost for words at this time, my heart felt condolences to Bola and the family. I met Femi in 1977 and we very quickly became friends and brothers in KC, fond memories of him always from those days even though we only met intermittently over the years as study and work took us in different directions, a gentle, kind soul. Rest in Peace. Ibrahim

Femi, we laid you to rest yesterday. It felt as though it was someone else we were celebrating and I kept meaning to text you to tell you about the really nice event I was at. I know you have extremely high standards but I think you would have been very pleased with the way everything went. We celebrated your life. Everyone was sad and happy to have known you. The tributes were incredible. I knew you were amazing, but I didn't realise so many other people shared the same thoughts.

I will miss you so much my dearest brother. From day 1 I have loved you. "You were my North, my South, my East and West." You were always so protective over me and I know how much you loved me. My heart is broken into shattered pieces.

I am glad that I had so many chances to tell you that you were the best big brother any girl could ever ask for. I wish I had known that morning when we chatted for 2 hours that you were on your way home. I would have told you one last time that I knew how lucky I was to have you as my brother. I wish I could have had you for longer.

You are resting in a beautiful place Femi. You can watch the sails on the lake as they pass by in the summer, and wait for the flowers to blossom in the spring. Your winters will be shorter now.

I'd like to say: It is well. But it really isn't. However, I do know that God loves you very much. How can he not love someone as wonderful and kind and as good as you? He made you and wanted you back. That's fair I guess. So I know you are safe in his bosom. You can sleep plenty now.

Go well my beloved brother. Until we meet again at the pearly gates.

I love you Femi.

My dear Femi remember when I used you as practice for my foray into the culinary arts....surely a disaster but you never had a bad word to say. I did not see you for many years but reading these tributes I see that nothing about you changed, still kind, still considerate. Femi I am pained. Rest in perfect peace.

My dear Femi,

Where do I start? This is just totally unbelievable. I spoke about you just a week before your demise. Told a friend about how you gave me a stern talking to after I got my exam results. I was upset I missed out on a First Class degree and you told me I had every reason to be proud of what I had achieved. You were such a huge part of my life in England. I sought your counsel on numerous occasions - often before speaking to my immediate family.

We lost touch when you moved to the U.S. and I am so grateful we had the opportunity to link up again about 5 years ago. I will treasure the wonderful memories I have of you. You were such a warm, caring and incredibly witty gentleman who will be missed.

Rest in peace, Femi

Dr. Ayatuga was a great doctor and a great person. Well dressed, soft spoken, and attentive. Takes care of his patients and coworkers. Very dedicated. We lost a great person. God knows best and I guess He picks the best amongs us. Rest in Perfect peace! You will be missed. Praying for comfort for the siblings and the family!

Gone too soon!
May God, The Father, He who knew us before we were born (Jeremiah1: 5) Comfort the family and bless the soul of the departed.
Amen.